Hi Melanie,
It can be difficult to determine what's abuse and what's not. I always suggest reaching out to someone you trust and or a licensed therapist for support and guidance. An outside perspective is always helpful. However, name-calling is a verbally abusive trait, and if you fear saying or doing certain things to avoid conflict, it might be time for outside intervention. Counseling may be able to help both of you communicate in a healthy way. You don't have to go it alone, and you don't deserve to live in fear. Always remember that. I wish you the best and encourage you to read more articles on HealthyPlace. They may give you the insight or sign you're looking for.
Light and love-Jenn